an abalone morning
In my other life, long ago, i was a Psych Tech at the University of Michigan. For 17 years. Where i learned how to be a Human Being. Then i taught myself to work with Spinal Cord Injured men. Did that...Art Therapy. Then i was part owner of a Book Store, while giving workshops on Creativity. Then i Ran Away to New Mexico where i did many things. Worked on an assembly line in a warehouse, did Home Care for Terminal people, worked at a Prison with Children and Families, worked for a woman who made Fairy Godmother dolls, did Landscape work, and HouseCleaning. All the while doing some form of personal Art. I wanted to become a Writer.
Today i went back to Peggy's house. I had quit Cleaning for her when i began getting Social Security. I quit most of my cleaning jobs. She was sad. Why? she wanted to know. Because i don't want to anymore, i said. I wanted to become even more Free. HouseCleaning, in New Mexico, is the most income for the least amount of time if you find the right "pool" of people to clean for. Here, where i ended up, that pool is, with the exception of the Old Cowboy, people who work at the college, New Mexico Mining and Technology. They are ALL, without exception, people from SomeWhere Else. All of them are couples with advanced degrees and interestingly enough, no children. All of them have animals. All of them hold their Place in great Love. Peggy is the mother of one of those couples, who i also cleaned for, from Boston. She has her own very excellent home that they built for her on their property when she moved here. Peggy was 90 this year. She and her son and daughter in law are disciples of Ishwar, a Living Master of the Sant Mat Tradition. For all the years i worked for her, she hoped that i would come to love Sant Mat. Come to love Ishwar. I didn't, but she loved me anyway. So, it's been some years since i cleaned her beautiful home and as i did again today, because she cannot find anyone, me agreeing to once a month, i had the opportunity to be aware of how i've changed in the last years. And it's true. i've softened. My edges have worn away. It was quite wonderful, really, to be there and experience her as 90 instead of 83 years old, to let her ask me off and on to do things she can no longer do, like empty the cat litter over the back fence. and when it was done, she fed me one of her just so Great squash qeusidillas and we sat together, noticing the Wind. She is a Gardner. Used to grow vegetables and take them to the Farmer's Market, selling out each time. She still Grows, but on such a small scale, for herself, to give. She wears beautiful earrings and great outfits of long skirts, T shirts and sweaters. Knee high socks and tennis shoes. She has had both knees replaced, one twice, and a hip replacement. She is pretty much deaf. She begins every single day with a two hour meditation. I took her half of the Paneer. She's a great cook. Vegan.
So What's this got to do with Anything???? Well, it has very much to do with this Cloth. LifeSpan.
How i am Living Here. With Goats. With an old cat and an old dog. With a NEW dog and sometimes feeling a little overwhelmed by the future of the Old Cowboy, but still, saying OK to Peggy. She says it's Karma. Nothing more and nothing less. And on that, i think i have to agree.