yesterday was the one year day from when the Old Cowboy died. The day he opened his eyes and looked me square in the face and left me here while he went On. and off and on i found self telling self that "it's Ok", after a life time of responsibility and work, i could really make good use of having a whole year, even, to re~orient. and i'm not sure at all where i am. but the year is up. ok.
first thing this morning i roasted chilis and peeled them. the fragrance............Only in New Mexico, these chilis. Really. Only here.
and then i made coleslaw.
My son called me late last eve. He's a Chef. like, a real one. He'd sent a link to
lifeandthyme.com the migrant kitchen Food in LA. i watched the two episodes available a bunch of times. I LOVE watching people cook whose deepest passion is Food. It's better than sex. Watching people cook. How they use tweezers to oh so CARE full y place a small sprig of something on the bowl of food. Food. And i was awash with thoughts and images about Growing. Growing enough FOOD to feed a Family of whatever sort. Enough FOOD. Permaculture. Keyhole Gardening. FEEDing people. I "asked" to please dream this. Dream this growing and cooking and feeding. I didn't. But tonight, I'll ask again. Who knows, maybe.
i think, how like a cocoon these pods are. The waiting for all the private and internal things to transpire and at some point, suddenly................they are among us. Kind of the opposite of the Old Cowboy, who spun his cocoon and went off into it. Maybe death is like a cocoon?????
in the midst of all the Magic Diaries work, the thing of
i needed to make a small cloth and it was about Magic, how Magic is always available, hovering,
to simply Call it