windthread

day 50 Om Mani Padme Hum

49 gentle Wind, maybe he is tired.

and this morning i looked at an all "new" Wall.  i'd thought i had been doing "nothing".  but saw this morning that it just had been in "that other way"...that is not conscious, but continuing, nonetheless

i put the megamendung woman over one of the strips of noil that i had tea dyed.  there was a resounding YES.  but it was too narrow.  

but, Look...this beautiful tea dye....just there....

and then the dark shadowed piece that's found itself on the wall for a while...waiting

and another resounding YES!

but back to the Megamendung woman....

she does need her own piece.  more tea dye.  it's wet here.  will dry lighter.  but this is good.  Very Very Good.

and the Iris.  between the day of WIND and then temperature dropping to close to freezing overnight, well...a little wear and tear, but still...an honorable bloom.

 

48 . the forecast was correct

WIND did

increase.  

maybe a pretty steady 60mph almost continuous roll of Wind.  again...reminds me so much of the last stage of labor when the contractions seem continuous, seem stronger and stronger, seem never ending....

as Sun heads for the rim in the West, it's slowing, quieting.  it's supposed to continue through the night and be "windy" tomorrow, once again.  then maybe Friday, the peace might come.  it is always so stunning, after days like these.  Very Suddenly ,  it stops.  just Stops.  is Over.  Done.

but now, in the meantime, nothing got flattened and i knock on wood.  there is a very weak place in the old fencing,  in the doe pen.  it's actually two panels that form a gate that was never used.  i need to do something about that.  now, i prop a large tree trunk against it but if Wind is really strong, the rocking of the gate loosens it and it is of no use.  like today.  SO.  you get a 6" piece of PVC about 2ft long and dig.  bury it in the center of those fence panels.  put a bag or two of Quick Crete to hold it.  then, into that you can put a 4x4 8ft post that is just off center between the panels and the some kind of something to extend over to the other panel from that post.  maybe a Diamond shaped piece of wood like Paul the fence maker made.   this will do it.   if there ever is a need to open those gate panels, the 4x4 can be removed from the PVC and the gates opened.  Who Knows????  not me.  but i watch when people do things and i am prepared.   so, ok.  by the end of this week i'll have that done?  i'll take pics.

the great thing about the Goats is that if something really different happened out there, like the fence slamming down, ....They would be VERY Loud about it.  i keep going to the door to look, but i really don't need to.  They would make that Very clear,  that their world was changed.  and even Buckwheat, back in the second vulnerable area...if something happened to the fence there, and he was able to get out, he would immediately come to where the does are.   i tell myself these things off and on through the day.  review scenarios.  remind self of certain things.  But it will be really nice when this Wind stuff is quiet.  all the while, the sky is a beautiful blue.  HUgE white clouds float peacefully through that Blue.  no storms.  no rain.  not anything but W I N D.  it's the primary reason that my daughter hates New Mexico.  her heart clings to MidWest springs of storms and tornadoes that get over with.  

very early this morning.  we'll see how things fared tomorrow morning.  

and at the bottom, LambsQuarters.  there might be a bumper crop this year.  they are of excellent nutritional value.  grow like weeds because they Are weeds.  but just grazed on raw, as i go...so so good.  Picked, steamed and then eaten with olive oil, a little vinegar...ahhhh.  this morning it was raw.

there were a stack of Notes to Self by the computer.  a good day to see what was really needing to be kept.  not much.

and i reorganized and got rid of stuff.  so the middle shelf of the "pantry", which WAS where the furnace used to be,  is now going to be just for Goat stuff.  Milking stuff, cheese making stuff.  i need to be ready.  it's coming soon.  

don't know why this pic is sideways.  Wind i guess.  i could try to fix it, but...i think not.  

 

 

 

 

47 forecast tomorrow: increasing Wind

ok.

today i took the denim futon cover off and replaced it with a nice duvet cover i found at the thrift shop.  Tazmeena immediately noticed a nice soft surface and began her work to press cat hair and dust into it.

today, everything you picked up got taken from you and thrown somewhere else.  ?Increased? Wind tomorrow?????  hmmm.  i hemmed a denim jumper.  thought a lot.  that's it. oh, cooked. oh, AND Talula and one of her mothers, Sydney came for a while.  we brushed and sang to goats.  Sydney is serious about learning the milking.  she wants to put her energy in to be a real practical part of the process.  Good then.  in exchange for milk and cheese,  they will cover a now and then need for someone to milk and feed if i am not back in time.

so...reading the above, i guess it was really just an ok day.  ok ~

 

 

46 WIND

i hung the clothes before i went off to work 2 jobs today.  this is how it was when i returned.  Still is, as a matter of fact.  i will go take them down now.

Alz B's daughter in law traded me one of my tomato starts for one of hers.  i dug it a nest in the compost debris and then put the protective barrier around it.  none of mine are ready to go outside yet. too little.  we'll see.

i feel like whining about the Wind.  but...there are other more hard things other places.  so..i'll just go try to get those clothes untangled, sit on the steps and drink some wine.  go dream.

 

 

 

 

Day 45 a looking day

centers are supposed to be perfect.   What If they are not?  Do they Have to be?  What does an imperfect center imply?

SomeOne came

looking Up at her,  the feeling of her is different.  Straight on,  there is a softer quality.  i like that.  i'd been wondering if i should "correct"  her right eye.   i think not. 

 

Day 44

today belonged to the Unforseen.  i woke, to look at the White Silk hanging out of the basket on the storage dresser, near the plastic raven and the Looker thing that little boy Julian and i made when he was here.  the branch with Mo's Hope is there too because the seedlings are on that window shelf

i take pics of my house like some women take pics of their children and grandchildren.

then...i went to visit Alz B at the old peoples joint.  thinking i would only stay a little bit, it was early, and then go to the Laundromat.  not.  her son, Bill was there.  so...we decided to go outside.  such a very Fine Day and we went out, through B's old alzheimer's unit to their little patio area.  on the way, we greeted and visited everyone there, the caregiver very happy to see us and  that took a while, catching up on Their News.  on outside.  Where we ended up, Betty and i singing.  We sang a lot of songs that only had intermittant lines of lyrics and in between a lot of  da da and na naNa...but it made us laugh.  Bill's internet line had been accidently cut by his neighbor and his backhoe so he did  a little on his laptop and in between it all we talked about a million things.  when we went back in, lo and behold, it was Lunch time so i stayed to feed B.  salisbury steak and gravy, scalloped potatoes and green beans.  Pinapple.  her favorite cranberry juice.  she kept thinking the moist washcloth used for sticky stuff was a dinner roll and being disappointed.  oh well.  i finally left.  off to the Laundromat to wash ALL the stinky dog blanket from winter

home and on the line.

ordinarily, this might have thrown me for a loop.  But...i think progress has been made from the computer crash, and i thought....OK, what now?

i pruned.  pruned the little transplanted Native Plum.  this, a big Advance for me.  Pruning and thinning not easy for me.  but..done and more dug out for a water bowl.

around the Raft, amidst the grass clumps and the Self Planted Globe Mallow,  i dug away and added some of the oh so beautiful goat compost.   at first , i used the shovel but then for the most part used my hands.   picking out last year's stems,  small root clumps. pulling away any Kochia and carrying it over to feed the Goats.  it doesn't look like much in these pics.  but it IS Much, really.  this part of this acre has gone through so many transformations.  now...i interfere as little as possible.  clearing these small places for the Cleome, Hopi   Black Sunflower from Patricia, the Zinnia from Deb Lacativa.   We'll see if the natives will welcome them.

and the sage.  BEAUTY  FULL this year

fixed the shovel

and the original little seat on the Raft.  my granddaughter Alyssia's.  this winter it just fell apart.  What to do?   I don't know.

and so...just a great day of Just Going.  all through it, i thought of Cloth.

 

Day 43 the bless~ed act of Just Going

How good this is.  to just go.  

a volunteer seedling of Doris's snake tree...a locust...here where some of the tomatoe plants will go soon.  it will need to be "pulled out",  or, maybe transplanted?  it looks like a handpuppet.

this year i WILL see about dyeing with the blooms.  soon as they begin to shrivel

Goats ate her mother in the Back.  she is by the front porch and will need to Carry On.

a good rot has begun.  i didn't fall to the temptation to see what the cloth was doing.  just looked.

and another RELIEF....looking at Suzanna's blog, MostlyThreads.Blogspot,  i read of her vacation at the ocean.  She showed me the beach there, a bird at her table, her wonderful room, AND some Jellyfish.

THE JELLYFISH!  and i rummaged and put together this.  FINALLY!!!!!!  SOMETHING

WHITE

and it is a very good good feeling.

so.  finally.  a day.  no imminent angst.  just a very plain good day.   So happy.

middle of the night

?????

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!  WITH THE TENACITY OF A PIT BULL!!!!!!!  I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!   OH HOORAY ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Day 42. just going.

ok.  bueno.  here we are and an Update of sorts.  

There WAS, indeed, an evil virus.  he described it as having roots.  the root part i liked, but the virus felt to me like VD.  but...now i know.  i will know, for the future, how that begins and will know enough to nip it in it's bud as cruel as that sounds.  

so...we have here, an Updated Windows program.  and Updated Chrome.  an Updated Picasa...what else...i guess that's it with the updates, but then AntiVirus stuff up the wazoo.  all my pics are still happily in their libraries, both Windows and Picasa.  the email remains the original, [email protected]  Stuff's O.K.  

it was the SHOCK of it.  the shock of finally getting a virus...me, who really hardly ever strays from the MotherShip.  who'dve thought????  alas.  and the SHOCK of the Windows 7 update...how it has changed everything.  nothing is in it's place that i'd created for it over the years.  and Chrome...well, it is Chromie.  whenever favorite color came up during my marriage to my children's father, and ?what is his favorite color?, chrome.  he was/is a chrome kind of guy.  me...weeds.dirt.compost.  anyway  so, now to figure out how to Just Go.  i have been able to seperate all the entities at work here.  identify what they do.  Windows 7.  Google Chrome.  Picasa. TypePad.  for some days, it was a blur.  or, really, kind of GAP...a blank space inbetween what was, what became, what no longer was and what i couldn't get to.  an odd gap.   

a couple times i thought i'd figured it out.  but i still have Not.  today, new pics will not download.  this is a BIG DEAL.  but i DO have Confidence that i will be able to figure it out.  it's not Everything, but, Windows7.  so.  ok.   breathe in and exhale.  ok.

and you know what was the WORST??????  that the screen saver that was a pic of my daughter was gone.  so....like Her Herself, now her pic is gone too.  it was a pic of her on my son's back tiny porch when he and his woman tried to live in Albuquerque for a while (it didn't work).  and we were All there (that isn't often) and my son's woman Heather made us the most excellent Margarita's and we were All together but privately wondering about the Unforseen...each in our own hearts...

isn't that funny????as in odd?  that something as plain as a screen saver can throw someone off the edge into a

GAP??????

and while all this has been my preoccupation, this 

has happened.  the young cottonwoods...there are two....one by the buck pen, one by the doe pen...both...are LEAFING.  this is their 3rd year.  the third year is the year of BEAUTY.  the first is totally ify just in general.  the second depends on what environmental happenings occur...length of season, draught conditions caused by degree of heat etc.  but if those first two years just go...the THIRD YEAR is a burgeoning of fierce energy and growth that MIGHT carry that plant being through all kinds of Unforseen.   I take this as a good sign.

and i love Everyone for hanging in there.  Really.  it's You All that are on the other side of the Gap. Thank You.