the short tutorial in pics.
there was Interest by all. i've left the gate tied Open so they can go in and out, so it will become familiar. it will be used only for the Training and the Fruits of the Training: hoof trimming. my neighbor Margie's son, Strongman, helped me move the milkstand.
early this morning
by early afternoon....
how i wish i could see in slow motion, could have watched the Real and True Miracle of this. Tomato Plant
i think this is It.
and all day i did these things but felt somewhat detached too. it's an odd feeling. i don't know what to say of it. really, there's nothing to say of it. just to Just Go in it. i had gotten to the place in the book that talks about Dream Yoga. this was in a certain way, new to me. i have avoided dream because my dreaming is so strange. but as i read through it, i was suddenly almost exhonorated. What if my strange dreaming were for purpose?, as was said in the book...the Lucid Dreaming...that i just do, with no volition...and that i don't really like at all....but just do......what if it will be of great use in the bardo??? so...this has set a certain tone. and Remember, this is above all a Journal. so if it is of no interest, that's ok. i still need to set it down here, on March 16th, 20014. Journal. and i talked yesterday about using the experience with Alz B to understand. and i am doing it again. in the middle of the day i took Sogyal Rinpoche's The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying off the shelf. many years since i have turned it's pages. and opened it to By the Bedside of the Dying. reading,....about those who have no spiritual background...which would be Alz B., which would also be her son who most likely will also be present, ....reading of invoking a Great and Beautiful Light, and i suddenly thought of FLOWERS. She loved FLOWERS. She had a rose garden in her front yard that she and i would sit amidst day after day, year after year. She loved the beautiful blooms so much, they filled her with great pleasure. And it is also true that the moment the blooms began to wither, she would become preoccupied with their "ugliness" until we had clipped all the withering blooms away and left only the buds of the new. But what i NEED to work with now is focusing on her love of the beauty. in the moments of her transition, she will need to Ride that Beauty into the new, into the unfamiliar. and my work will be to talk of it...to remind her to Look for that.
so...thinking.
