windthread

maybe a storm comes

it might.  i can see it way even beyond the Rim.   maybe.

 

 

 

the Salt Cedar.  considered noxious.  great Effort to eradicate it from New Mexico.   There are Opinions,  because i have let one grow...over by the fence.  this is it's only child in 18 years.  i have let it grow too.  they are said to be invasive.  and it is, true,  but....any minute the Tanangers will come, hang upside down from the thin branches like ornaments.  always,  the Tanangers come, only for this.  and Bees.  the Bees.  

 

i am going to try to make a cloth of them,  on the raft,  under a Sunflower.  We'll see.

 

Great Wind, again.  again.  again.  today.  and as i went out to gather up some wood for the small morning fire,  i looked and 4 blooms had succumbed.  so...into the India Jar...just to see.  and maybe yes,  maybe it might make Sky cloth.  another maybe.

and just to help the Goats remember,  i went out just now and called them over to the shelters that i built for them,  that they generally totally ignore.  except for when there is moisture from the sky.  so, since it's maybe a storm tonight,  i called them over.  went inside and sat,  they zoomed in and whirled and zoomed back out.  but at least it was a reminder.   i've done my part.  

 

 

 

 

sitting with Iris

was unusually tired today.   there were things i'd thought i'd DO.  but i didn't.  i woke.,  sat like i do,  then when they called, fed the Goats.  spent some time Out There.  came in.   looked around.  went back Out.   moved the little stool over and sat with the Iris.  pulled stool up close.  really close and just looked.  tried to REALLY look.  but i was tired.  so after some time, i came back in and layed down.  slept.  waking,  i was thinking already, in my sleep of this...

 

the quick drawing .   and then,  i began reading  Spiritual Ecology.  i read the the introduction.  then,  the first of the Essays therein.  called Listening to Natural Law     Chief Oren Lyons.  

you can google him.  Faithkeeper of the Turtle Clan of the Onondaga Nation.  there are UTubes too.    These are the things i underlined:

"The spiritual side of the natural world is absolute.  The laws are absolute.   There's no habeas corpus in natural law.  You either do or you don't."

"We have to be thankful.  That's what we said.  Two things were told to us.  To be thankful, so those are our ceremonies,  ceremonies of thanksgiving.  We built nations around it., and you can do that too.  And the  other thing they said was enjoy life.  That's a rule, a law---enjoy life---you're supposed to.   I know you can only do as much as you can do, and then when you do that, you're supposed to get outside and enjoy life.  Don't take yourself so seriously.  Do the best you can but get at it. "

 

First Iris day

 

it seems that the aphids and the Iris have some mutual concerns.   there were no aphids on these BLOOMS.  not a one.   but still, on the tight buds.  

 

and the butterfly made of Wind is back.  i think to stay.   stitched a little,  just enough.  When i look from a distance,  like when i'm near the wood stove, or even in the Living room,  and see it there,  there is a very good feeling.   

 

I arrived at the Old Cowboy's home early this morning so i could help him get ready to move out and be at a 10 a.m. appointment with his lawyer.   Help him get ready consists of a LOT of repeated conversation.  What he wants to say to his lawyer and then also all the History to Everything, as in how things came about.   This goes back 50 and 60 years.  He has to say it.  He has to say it a few times, at least.  ....  he talks and then says "you understand me Girl?"    NONE of it is new.

so, we did that.   What i could have said to the lawyer in three concise sentences took him an hour and a half.  I sat listening with my eyes closed.  This helps FEEL his angst,  his SENSE of the position he is finding himself in.  

and then, we went to his accountant to sign this years tax papers.  he could not go in and was "ashamed".   so,  Wendy, his "tax girl"  came out to the car with the papers and a clip board.  she squated next to the car while he studied the papers and signed  after 3 red x's.  i wrote the checks out for him and he signed those.  and then he had the exact same conversation with Wendy that he has had for years.  Wendy, a very kind and gentle woman, responded exactly as she has for years.

that done,  we went to Lotta Burger and ordered a Lotta Burger with cheese and green chili,  fries and a pepsi.  Waited.  brought it back to his house and split it and consumed amidst him reliving every moment that preceeded that.    

then he remembered that he was plum out of Centrum Silver vitamins.  so....off to Walmart for them and back.  where we reviewed Everything one more time.

i came home and took a nap.  woke,  but couldn't really wake.  so i stitched that butterfly made of Wind and fed the Goats.  i am going to go to sleep tonight as soon as i can.  i have Things on my Mind and want to stay up,  when i wake in the middle of the night,  and see exactly what they are.  i will wake somewhere around 2 am.  will make tea.  sit in the Dark and wait to Find Out.  then,  when i can see it clearly,  i'll go back to bed till morning.

 

 

 

 

 

 

close to taking a little rest.....just sitting. doing some Correspondence. black mark on white paper

it can rest a little while now.   a day or two.  or a few.  just As Is.   Mo made a really thought Full comment yesterday,  that to her the butterfly is a distraction and superfluous.  i like both those words and what they mean here a LOT.   distraction.  superfluous.  and i thought about that a lot.  in a way, it is very true.  but there is something in me that really likes that butterfly made of wind.  and likes it There.   so i went to wikipedia and looked at the word Kitsch.

" a lowbrow style of mass produced art or design using popular or cultural icons.  The term Kitsch is generally reserved for unsubstantial or gaudy works or decoration, or works that are calculated to have popular appeal."

"according to Walter Benjamin, Kitsch is, unlike art, a utilitarian object lacking all critical distance between object and observer, it  "offers instantaneous emotional gratification without intellectual effort, without the requirement of distance, without sublimation."

and i liked very much all this as definition of kitsch.    and it's true.  that the moment i pressed that butterfly to this cloth, the term kitsch~y rose up.

BUT.

i also like it.  i am going to look at it both ways for a while.   and i am also looking in terms of the idea of Theater that Jude mentioned.  i went back back and back in the picasa library to find a cloth that i made, sort of,  at the very beginning of my time as Jude's student.  it was directly about Theater and i went on with that word Theater for a while.  making the curtain in the big west window the theater cloth.  adding things to it,  that created a sense of Theater.   but then, as i was scrolling through Picasa,  i realized how much of what i make is nothing more than that.    In that, they are simply scenes.    that seem to be set.  like a moment in time,  JUST before something happens.  and what the something is, we don't know.  it's just a cloth of that moment, Just before.  and how much i LIKE that.   so...having all this in my head,  i was OutSide today and saw it all repeated Out There.  it's all a scene.  nothing happening in that moment that is obvious,  but it is all Ready.  all in place.  So MANY things MIGHT happen.  or not.  and how much i love that moment.

Theater.  how life is Theater, really.   

 

i want to make a Sunflower Theater

 

maybe like this one on my Magic Diaries cloth?

 

early this morning i was looking at the Warm Weather Curtain on the door to the Way Back.  thinking about making a cloth loom of it.  do i want to?  or do i love it just as it is?

 

close.  to get the bloom right i had to tweek the rest

 

and eeeeeeee     If you double click you can see the aphids.   wondering if this portends a particular kind of growing season????   i have never noticed this before.

and right now,  the single Robin,  Robinda,  is speaking.  has not gone on yet.  is remaining longer than usual.

 

 

of it's own accord

the leaf got reinforced.  stitched with both very tiny walking stitch  and invisible baste  (Jude Hill) to a soft muslin backing.  it will remain independent.  

 

but THEN>>>>>stuff happened.   there are thread beads  (again, Jude Hill)  across the top.....and i think two more partial rows of the black underneath.  maybe.  

and a butterfly, made of WIND.  yes.  it's kind of kitsch~y  but...butterflies just are.  no way around it.  and this one, a spirit,  made of WIND....it's good.

The Leaf.  the leaf,  i love resting on the cradle of the cloth scrap.   it will not be stitched on.  but free.  i don't know why.  but it is what it is.   i thought as i stitched how often a chrysalis is within a leaf.  maybe this?  i don't know.  i feel ok about not knowing too.  

and then, as i was stitching the final thread beads across the top,  i just dropped a piece of black thread.  and it stopped me.  i looked.   long.   so....this is the thread of Divination.  Divination as in yarrow sticks for I Ching,  bones for the Yourba people,  Runes.   The thread of divination.  of Course!  what  WOULD it be for a Loom of Cloth,  an Instrument of Cloth,  a Theater of Cloth????

a thread.

just a single elegant thread.  Yes.  and Yup.  This is it.  So, the leaf and the thread are free,  but accompany the cloth.  accompany the cloth.  i like that.

 

 

 

the Leaf

so...WHY?  Why is this Leaf so important?   The Moon is in it's place.  done.  but this Leaf...this leaf.  What is it about the Leaf?   as Kathleen commented the other day, she smiled at it's movement.  well...today,  it went everywhere.  all places just fine and good,  but it kept moving.

and i say ,  WHAT?!....What, Leaf????   What are you Saying?????????

given planets

the strips are...hmmm,  firm.  like they would be,  if this were a real loom.  firmly in place.  firm.

they are invisibly basted,  but after my finger made them firm,  like would happen on a loom.  the feeling of doing that was great pleasure.  moving them in.  inTo one another.  it felt really really good.  the only strip loose now is the diamond/dot,  life of all things, strip.  i am not sure about that one.  will wait.

 

work away day.  and when i got there, on the kitchen counter next to the cobalt glass fruit bowl was a large paper shopping bag.   the above in it.  these are livestock water tank floats.  Copper.  now there are 5 here.  the first is in the diamond child buddha garden which is now the Woad garden,  child buddha having moved to the baby goat grave by the Raft.   the second hangs over Ramone's grave,  from the Desert Willow just outside the Inside gate.   now.  where do These go?  and How?

 

the oldest.  look at this corrosion.   the dents in it are from someone breaking ice in the water tank in Winter with a tool.

they are like Planets to me.

 

 

oh well....

i don't know.  i don't know much of anything at all.  and today,  i made my Self stay OutSide.  like a kid.  when the Adult of the house says:  Go Out Side.  Find something to DO.   so...i did.  i stayed OutSide, all day.  when WIND came and was wreaking havoc,  i hunched over against the West Fence, by the Cucumbers.  Squated down.  watched stuff be buffeted to and fro.  and then...Wind would forget.  and there would be a time of softness and warmth and i would poke around.  just looking at stuff.  noticing.

 

the young Locust.  beginning to leaf.  the Praying Mantis Egg Case...

 

Mexican Elderberry.  Very leafy.

 

young Woad

 

baby Woad

 

how the dorky Morning Doves feed with the Goats.  can you see them?  like at twelve oclock?

there?...they like the seeds i guess,  dropped from when i distribute the hay between the 5 bowls.  the Goats no longer notice them.  Just accept them as part of their world.   and i found the bamboo back scratcher.  it was under the porch,  the front porch,  from when Julian was here.  he used it for many things.  and now,  i can use it for the Goat Taming Tool...like at Mustang Camp.  it is first.  before the human hand.   you say "can I Touch You?"  and extend the backscratcher ....scratching.

D!   and give a peanut.

 

Can i touch you?grace?D!and give a ......what?....what would be my "reward"??????

Thinking about thoughts

a Question for the Book of Wonder.   Who do Thoughts belong to?   

something was said that gave me pause,  about blogging.  about comment sections being group conversations about  her thoughts...the her,   being the blogger.   and i was surprised by how that surprised me.   applying it to this blog,  what was it that was Surprising?    i thought about it  a long time, am still thinking about it.    and i realized that i don't really claim any of the thoughts here as My thoughts.  Somehow, i think  of them as just this kind of Generic Stream of Consciousness...thinking about things that Anyone and Everyone thinks in the course of days of a life.  Nothing really amazing or in my case, interesting,  one day to the next.  just , well, thoughts.  I did have that one thought a while back that i was so happy about that i called my First original thought.  so...i had one.  but, One.   so Why put thoughts here?  

so i am thinking about this.  still.  and all i've come up with so far, is that it's a discipline of sorts for me.   that,  AND  i like having Company.  i do.  i like having company, come and go.  in and out.    again.  living alone and having few real conversations in my day to day life,  You who comment here are my world in a way.   is that pathetic?  Maybe.

 

so i stitched down the top of the loom.  it is now secure.  and i added a very significant thing that is hard to see here

 

that top strip.  it's resolved a LOT for me about that strip of COLOUR....that was completely Right, but also completely COLORFULL.  so now.  now it is good.  yes.  

 

 

 

 

 

same kind of Crazy

put 3 of the tomato plants out

 

snap bean seeds in the Earth

 

and chard.  Gave Water.  and it's the same feelings as about the Goats....oh....they are 

out

there 

in the dark and windy hours...

of course they are, i say to self.   of course.  it's their Nature to be.   but still...the feelings

 

but look.  there are Many.  and how FIERCE, iris.   

 

 

small things now.  looking.  adding.  taking away.  Waiting.