Maybe it's the degree to which i have become symbiotic with the Whole of this Place. My words are my mind. Which is less and less the self that i am now, less and less the part of self that i hold of value.
It's the Being me, the just going me the me that is Same as OutThere, OutThere being the whole of it, Wind, Light, Air, Leaf, Dirt, Stone, Goat, Bird, on and on. Their lives are my life, Same. and maybe more so since the Goats...because they have tied me to a rhythm that is bigger than my single self.
With words, i really can't tell of Them. The photographs can, do...
ok...so i was going to show You a weed that had placed herself perfectly between two rocks, creating an elegant rosette pattern. Here are the WORDS for what i was going to show you. But
oh well....it's happening again. No pics.
what to Do. How to Feel.
...................................OK. I am going to stop whining. OK.
What ELSE there was to this day was that the Old Cowboy was ecstatic. Travis, the new Angel in his life, TRIMMED HIS TOE NAILS yesterday. He says he feels like a new man. He was HAPPY! with his toe nails. It was after his Monday shower. And i think of this. How in the so far to now past, he wanted me to do everything. Partly because he didn't want to PAY anyone to do things. He wanted me to clean his house and supervise his shower and cut his toe nails all for no more than the Usual. I was stubborn about that. I would clean his house, shop etc., but nope. I would not do the other things. So we had been at a stand off for a long time. Then...with the disappearance of the possibility of moving UP to the relatives, with his decision to stay put, some how stuff changed and he was willing for more, more being Travis. But today, as i cleaned his house and washed his clothes and put away the groceries, he was ......THRILLED....with his toe nails. THRILLED. like, really, THRILLED. and i was too. Bless us. Bless Us All as we figure out how to go.
and then...i got an Email from Kelly who has my goats, Barbara and Magic, and who i bought a little Buckling goat for from Deanna who used to be friends with my daughter Jenny....got an email from Kelly who said that he arrived on Sunday, little buck, and his name is Moon, his Family name, his registered name is still to be decided, but little Moon, who is a bottle baby, went with her this morning as she did her chores, following along. He will be the sweetest of the sweet, these bucklings, and she will be IN LOVE with him, but soon, he will take on his Buckness and tho he will always continue to love her, he will be totally preoccupied with Barbara and Magic, the doe Goats from here and he will become Herd Sire.
I'll go over there soon. Take a pic. Which i may or may not be able to show YOU here.....