Thinking continuously about Vayla. Vayla, the girl in Wendy's EssayTelling. How she knows.
"I could not figure out why I liked textiles sewn with spaces in them. Why I like the way this woman sewed her cloth, leaving me a way to see the sun through the cloth, I think of why someone would stitch cloth that has spaces. "
the center of this, i think, will be Cut Out. Making a Space. I have no idea what might come into that cut out space but i feel good, really good, thinking about a cut out space. I began the kantha that will rim the circle. I already know how that's going to feel, the substance that cloth acquires with kantha stitches. Am anticipating that, how it feels. And then after that's done, the center will be cut out and become very Light. What will go there?
And at On Being, there is a conversation with a composer of Movie Music...musical scores, i forgot to write down his name but you can go look. He talks about Spaces in music. Spaces. Maybe we need spaces so things can fully be what they Are. Not all of Us, but some of Us. and What if we are of the Some of Us Clan? that need space. Lots of it. Vayla needs space for her work. I need space for mine. Different Work, but our WORK. So we NEED it. Not to just Indulge in, but NEED it.
At some point today the thought came....i am going to Take as much time as i possibly CAN to do what i NEED to do. Whether or not it makes sense to any other person, I am going to TAKE as much time as i possibly can. I think this is the work of the Protection Cloth. It kind of feels like
stealing time
and ok, then. i will steal it. I can try to explain myself till i'm blue in the face about what matters to me as a human being and people might kind of nod and listen but they have no idea. So i'm left with a possibility of stealing time. As much as i can. Would this make me a Thief?
Places of Spaces on the Magic Diaries Cloth
which is now folded, quiet, on the back of the futon. I will do it slow. One space at a time. There is no hurry.
I am letting myself learn that cloth doesn't have to be FLAT. it can be, stitched and Be, in it's form as it falls of it's own accord. This is ok. How stuff seems to Want to Be is ok., follow it.
and then, i think of the small boy at the end of Wendy's Telling. Who arrived with a teacher's note and a Mother who was his ally, who brought a boom box so he could do what he NEEDED to do, so he could hear both Sam and Valarianna at the same time. How he knew he needed this. Both. He needed both at the same time and because he needed it, it happened. So, him too. Teachers. This boy, Vayla. I am learning.