someone's Christmas card had glitter. and now, in the most unexpected moments, there will be glitter. Like right now on the right thigh of my levi's. Glitter. I haven't thought about Glitter in a long time. There was a time in the past when it was interesting to sprinkle a trail of it here and there, now and then, i would have been in my 20's. And then when my kids were little, i used to buy them tubes of glitter to do whatever with.
I woke this morning thinking i wanted to take my friends Mike and Thelma of the now defunct Native Plant Nursery something for "the holidays". They always bring me something. we'd become friends over the years. They bring me a bottle of wine or something Thelma had baked. Just stop by and honk and drop it off. Or, i would meet them over at Thelma's parents home down the way along the ditch and sit to visit with all of them, her Mom and Dad such gracious people, her dad is dead but just before he died i gave him the one eye'd little stone carved bear, telling him the bear would help him find me after he was On the Other Side. He said OK. So i decided i wanted to take them a Christmas pizza. So called and it was perfect timing and i did take it and enjoy it with them and we sat outside in SUN that finally glowed through the cloud cover and talked about the New Year coming and tried to understand things about that and agreed we couldn't possibly understand anything. But agreed we would try.
Then i stopped by the Grocery store to pick up a pork roast for the across the road Margie so she could use it to make posole. and tin foil. never enough tin foil. and the store was jammed packed. A LOT of talking, standing in the isles talking and how you need to be patient waiting for the exchanges to finish. Just SO many people shopping and i thought about how i wasn't shopping for some big cooking extravaganza, i could appreciate how everyone WAS...and i thought how though i am exempt from Christmas now, i COULD look. I could look at them, the non-exempt, could look at their bright eyes and flushed cheeks and wonder about what it all is. Holidays are a big deal in New Mexico. COOKING is BIG. Family is BIG.
And i thought about how Jude is always talking about New Eyes and i thought to try to look at it all with new eyes, different eyes...to cast aside the familiar filters and just look. and i found myself truly loving humanity. in this grocery store. this small local independent grocery store in South Central Rio Grande Valley of New Mexico, USA and how there WAS, there WAS organic potatoes, a 5lb bag and i said loud to the produce guy....YOU DID IT!!!!! ....i'd been on his butt for a while because somehow they weren't having them...and i yelled YOU DID IT and he said...."for you". Dear him, i annoy him constantly. I think he can't imagine WHY anyone might need organic potatoes. as in What's my Problem.
I came home and dropped off the pork to Margie and came in to look long at the wet TREE, how the Goats like wet wood and were working at stripping the bark and i took a nap and woke a couple times but not wanting to and drifted back to sleep and so was late waking, really, but there was glitter on the floor by the morning chair where i sat and drank a cup of coffee before going OUT to see what was UP with the Goats.
this is an image i tore out when i was looking at them for the matchbox collages. It's a photograph of a bridge somewhere. This second, in sepia.
I want to go slow now. Look without those familiar filters. This is what will "save me". Plus, a little glitter.
