
same as yesterday but in evening light. so....not same. and not same because at around 5:30 there was
Rain
this does not happen.
but it did. just some drops off and on for about an hour, but it rained. Sitting at Alyssia's house earlier in the carport swimming pool trampoline zone i said.....it's like there's going to be rain....but we just kept on with other things because it couldn't possibly be rain and then just after i got back here, it rained. it rained. How many times will i need to say that to take it in? Something that can't happen, did.
i'd gone there to pick up the ice thingys we use in my refrigerator. she freezes them at her house. this time of year we replace them every 3rd day. Because of the disruption of her truck with the stolen catalytic converter i need to go there to pick it up. We decided to go check out the new Asian Grocery. we ate spring rolls. bought things we don't know what they are. As we left her house, we turned down her sidestreet instead of going straight out to the main street, a block. Drove down her street, then out.
sounds pretty ordinary. None of it was.
i don't know why she said to go down her street but she did and i'd never gone that way before. We went past her next door neighbors who are being evicted. a Big uhaul out front. N California is so much more complex than i have any clue. So much more complex than anywhere i have ever lived. There are neighborhoods. like patchwork quilt.....?????? some made of silk, velvet. some of beautyfull quilt fabrics, hand dyes, some of old household cloth, some of rags. Hers is somewhere between the old household cloth and rags. the houses are all old. All in some state of disrepair. They are old maybe 40's? i don't know, wood frame, all different but all very close to eachother, what else can i say....if i felt comfortable doing that, i would take many photographs of them....they are like people, the houses. The houses have lives and then bear the burden of holding the lives of the people who live within. Many are rented like Alyssias. A few are uhhhhh, pretty, they all were, at some point in time, some still are but most ...there is a sense of disarray...marginalization. Marginal lives within. As is everywhere, there are TREES and BUSHES and FLOWERING PLANTS, a profusion. and as we slowly drove and i tried to take all this in there was suddenly a GARDEN of many many SUNFLOWERS...tall, Many and a man was just coming down his walk and there was eye contact and i felt like a gawker and called out....BEAUTYFULL!!!!!!!!!! your SUNFLOWERS!!!!!!!!! he nodded.
she says that the neighborhood just down, close to the downtown are the ones where you would not want to live. When she was looking for a house to rent, she went there. I sit and think as i write this. Will i ever see them? probably not. It feels perverse, to go...just to look.
the new grocery...like the new Mexican Grocery...is BIG and shiny newly inhabited and and isles and isles of things i have no idea about and doing a brisk business which all felt very good....like the mexican grocery, it is a family venture and it's happening for them. we'd read about it in the local news. People are resilient...come here and with so much work, make their way. in America.

lace lady emailed this. it's from one of the HandEye Magazine stories they did about Wendy's work. I don't have any of those magazines. I so wish i did but i had no access to them at the time and when i tried to get back issues it couldn't happen for reasons i don't remember. This is a Cloth with Tay. It's on a drum. Dog Cloth. and of course...this would come today.
i am so full to the brim in this moment. more, really...it's seeping over the edges,
I live here. Going for ice to keep food cool. I live here illegally. it's all crazy. there's so much more to say, but it rained. and i am tired and there is FULL MOON rising. there was rain and this moon on the boy's cloth scraps. so yes. this is what i have.