just past B Garden, just on the side of this little meadow where Old Cowboy's Mother's rocking chair, lawn chair is that holds his box of stuff...his slippers, teeth, glasses. Alyssia had to move branches to drive up. Maybe 70ft. at least.
i heard it. was just waking, First Light, i thought it was closer and i looked but couldn't see. Thought maybe i dreamed it. But i heard the sound of it ripping off.
right at Earth. a just Letting Go. For maybe a hundred years, Vertical and then...just Letting Go.
the Feeling of it
Tomorrow is Thursday again. Trust Time. and where i've come in these 6 days....about Trust.....is simple in a way, but in a way so not. What i think i can Trust: Everything seems to hang in a balance of 50/50. the degrees over can change the game. In these days now. and i can Trust that there are enough on "my" 50 side to
hold
so far.
and that part of my Trusting is that i am constant in my effort to be Kind. to be Genuine. to share kindness and a Real as i move in this world. At every opportunity. so that the other 50% can feel it and be touched by it. To feel the good of kindness and Real, how it can soften Fear. Small ways like when i set out tomorrow morning as early as i possibly can...to make my way to the Dollar Store and then Lakeside Grocery. To say...no...you go first....to smile behind the mask....to exchange any words that create a real exchange of human ness., goodwill. to Grow my 50%. This is a clumsy effort to give words to a lot of thought but it's all i've got. it's Hot. And i thought about how we made such effort to eradicate indigenous people from this continent but it didn't prevail. They held on. And today, teach their languages to the young. Teach pride. Deb Haaland is Secretary of the Interior. Love that term...the Interior...a native woman, Secretary of the Interior, i smile.... but then, there is the Decision from the Supreme Court...these words seeming fake....Supreme Court...story like....but they will decide. because it's what we agree to...a "Supreme" Court... And then...we have a Committee to investigate Lying. at greatlength. Emrie is learning about lying. she is 4. but we have a Committee. a country of adults...has a committee. ok. what can i do. what can i do to sustain the balance? to allow it to hold, that we don't fall into that world of Octavia Butler's premonition . today would be her birthday. 75 years old. Dee told me that.
