it began like any other, wake, become upright, make Tea, drink Tea, watch daylight unfold, feed Goats, Cook, feed self, Little Sleep, 20 minutes, second Tea
like any other but then i took up the Sketch Book, noticing how few pages are left in this one and turned to the first. and it spiraled from there. In? or Out?, the spiral? what's the difference? First some pages have printouts glued in of Still in New Mexico...August, 2016 Beginning about the Old Apricot Tree i didn't look at many pages, really, skimmed through till more recent....but those skimmed pages are YEARS. and i remembered something Beth said....Still Life Pond.... "I don't think in words" and how many times i have remembered her saying that...DID SHE REALLY?, say that? I emailed her to find out and it mattered because i thought how when i "heard" her say that i was.....REALLY?!!! yes!!!! i don't either!!!! and i spent time with that and realized i think in Pictures...like that thing i have about it all being like a Slide Show...the pictures projected on the blank wall...click, click, click and it's how it was....tryinging to think about August 2016
where was I?
and then....when did i Get HERE? and i had to go back through so many clicks of the slide show But the pic here. The Magic Diaries Cloth i think? on that Wall i used to have in New Mexico
and maybe this all is also connected to Emrie's questions about why i live in this little place with no working microwave...she had a lot of questions I tried to tell her about the house in New Mexico
all these words all these words all this thinking how i don't do this much anymore and how much a relief it is really, that it's all just stuff, really.... Beauty FULL stuff but Stuff. and as an aside, i realized somewhere in all this i realized that it's all documented in the thing of this sidebar Archives
i went there and saw Emrie just born Emrie, why i came here. born July 2017
